Millitary Men and Their Parenting Style

When many people think about the parenting style of military men, they assume that these men treat their children as if they are the platoon commander and the children are the soldiers. Indeed, this is true in some cases. However, it is certainly not true in every case.

Military men and women, like all parents, use different styles of parenting. Some are more authoritative while others tend to be more permissive. Some are cuddly while others are more hands off. The important thing to keep in mind is that all parents, regardless of the style of parenting which they employ, want the best for their children. All parents want their children to grow up to be conscientious and well behaved adults.

There are several different styles of parenting, and these affect childhood in many different ways. In most cases, different types of parenting fall somewhere along a spectrum. The spectrum starts on the permissive side and ends on the authoritative side.

Parents who are overly permissive may not give their children any rules. They may feel like giving their children rules is like interfering in their life. Parents who are authoritative, in contrast, may seek to give their children a lot of rules. They may feel like rules are an integral part of teaching their children how they should be as adults.

Most outsiders assume that military men fall on the authoritative side of the spectrum, and of course, many military men do fall on that side of the spectrum. However, in actuality, most military men fall somewhere in the middle of the spectrum. For instance, they may think that their children need to be well behaved and obedient. Qualities like those are often prized on the authoritative end of the parenting style spectrum.

However, at the same time, these men may want their children to feel understood and loved. Thus, they may be willing to discuss matters with their children rather than just punishing them indiscriminately for wrong doings. This places these men nearer to the permissive side of the parenting style spectrum. The place that men are on that spectrum may vary, and it may be influenced by a number of factors including their own childhoods and their partner’s childhood.

Although military men parent differently from each other, they all face similar issues in their parenting journey. One of the hardest things for military men to face that most civilians never encounter is extended absences from their children. During deployment, military men may spend months or even years away from their children. During this time, their partner or a trusted family member may be left to care for the children on their own. For this reason, it is critical that military men and their partners agree on their basic parenting style. When they are in agreement, the children are more likely to have the same style of parenting regardless of whether or not their father is deployed.

In addition to consistency, military men must also make special considerations about how to connect with their children while they are deployed. It is typically easier to maintain a connection with older kids. These children may talk on the phone or even video conference their deployed fathers. Keeping in touch with babies or toddlers is more difficult. In these cases, the father may want to record himself reading to the child. Even babies in utero can get to know their father’s voice by listening to a prerecorded CD of them reading.

About the Author: Kaylee Wilson is a freelance writer married to a military man. She also writes articles on Military Boarding School help from TheFamilyCompass. Know more about Military Boarding School help from TheFamilyCompass.

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